Baldur’s Gate 3 introduces a cast of colorful companions to accompany you on your journey, not the least of which is Astarion, a poised and witty high elf rogue whose confident demeanor hides several dark and dangerous secrets.

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When you first meet him, Astarion can come off as extremely cocky, guarded, and occasionally smarmy, making it challenging to get on his good side—especially if you’ve got your heart set on playing the hero in your grand adventure. But with enough persistence and patience, you can break down those walls and find a well of vulnerability deep beneath.

This guide contains slight spoilers regarding Astarion's backstory and secret.

All About Astarion, The Pale Elf

Astarion is a charming, skilled combatant capable of dealing hefty damage, navigating through the shadows with ease, and even casting useful spells, depending on the subclass that you choose for him.

But for those looking for more out of Astarion than heavy-hitting sneak attacks and astounding mobility, here's a detailed rundown of exactly how you can win him over.

Where To Find Astarion

You'll be able to find Astarion at the very start of the game by following these steps:

After crash-landing on the Ravaged Beach after the game's tutorial, head north along the beach, staying close to the wreckage to your left.

Eventually, you'll come across a hole that leads (X:266, Y269) into the crashed Nautiloid ship. There will be three Intellect Devourers scuttling about here, so be ready for a fight.

After defeating the Intellect Devourers, continue straight through the crashed ship out to the Wilderness on the other side.

From here, follow the path north until you hear Astarion calling out for help.

Walk close to him to trigger a cutscene where he'll attempt to trick you into fighting a boar in order to attack you.

Fend him off or convince him that you are no threat, and you'll get the option to ask him to join you on your travels.

Astarion's Personality, Likes And Dislikes

Astarion is a jaded individual who craves power and sees little value in playing the hero—though he seems to greatly value kindness shown towards himself.

Cruelty And Mockery

When you first meet him, Astarion possesses a penchant for mockery, finding delight in making fun of or manipulating others in cruel ways.

That being said, he seems to appreciate the occasional act of benevolence, such as when you demonstrate aid towards those who have been similarly subjugated like himself. Similarly, he seems to balk at the idea of you enslaving anyone, such as when negotiating for the artist captured by the Zhentarim.

Dislike For Heroics

Be wary of being too generous while accepting sidequests, as Astarion displays unabashed disdain for heroics—trying to play the gallant hero for everyone in need will earn you some disapproval in his book.

Contrary to more kindhearted companions, Astarion generally shows his approval when you turn down requests for help that are unrelated to you and your party's wellbeings.

Astarion also detests the idea of noble sacrifice, disapproving if you promise to take Nettie's poison when the process of ceremorphosis starts.

Personal Loyalty And Kindness

That said, Astarion can be a little hypocritical: he likes it when others are kind towards him, though he draws the line at sympathy, and quickly lashes out when he thinks he is being pitied.

This means taking the reveal of his secret in stride and even allowing him to feed on you when he admits to you that drinking humanoid blood would make him feel stronger and fight better.

Power And Control

Astarion's traumatic past has left him craving power and control, making him enamored with the illithid powers that allow you to exert your will on others who serve The Absolute.

Throughout our journey, he persistently encourages you to embrace these abilities, even as other companions warn against them—and he appreciates it when you take his side on these matters.

In the same vein, he keenly avoids being taken advantage of –in the case of Raphael and his offer– and wants you to actively pursue options that will help him control the mindflayer tadpole in his head –such as telling Auntie Ethel about it.

Trickery And Mischief

Unsurprisingly, this chaotic rogue also enjoys watching mayhem unfold during your travels. Whether it's flinging poo at goblin guards or barging in on an ogre and bugbear going at it in a barn, you can be assured that choosing the funniest option will bring a smile to Astarion's face.

How To Raise Astarion's Approval

Here are some examples of dialogue options that you can choose to raise Astarion's approval rating with you:

Courting Astarion Romantically

You'll have plenty of opportunities to get Astarion to warm up to you—and, in fact, you'll need to if you want to avoid a scathing rejection from him that'll leave you reeling. As of Act 1, there is only one opportunity to get involved with Astarion romantically and carnally.

This occurs during the celebration at the end of Act 1, whether you decide to side with the druids of Silvanus' Grove, or the goblins at the Goblin Camp.

During this celebration, you'll be able to engage in conversation with Astarion. If your approval rating with him is high enough—getting above Medium is a safe bet—he'll initiate a request to share an intimate night later on.

To be absolutely sure that your bedroll won't go empty that night, you can choose the following dialogue options:

After that, return to your bedroll and choose Astarion when prompted to pick a companion to share your bed with.

A cutscene will ensue—and as long as you don't choose dialogue options that insult (or incinerate) Astarion, you and the vampire rogue will have nothing but a pleasant night to look forward to.

NEXT: Baldur's Gate 3: Best Builds For Astarion